{"id":1730,"date":"2007-10-28T17:57:40","date_gmt":"2007-10-28T22:57:40","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/chimeraobscura.com\/vm\/nba-2007-08-preview\/utah-jazz\/"},"modified":"2007-10-28T17:57:40","modified_gmt":"2007-10-28T22:57:40","slug":"utah-jazz","status":"publish","type":"page","link":"http:\/\/chimeraobscura.com\/vm\/nba-2007-08-preview\/utah-jazz","title":{"rendered":"Utah Jazz"},"content":{"rendered":"

Predicted Record<\/strong>
\n48-33 (Tom), 56-36 (Gil)<\/p>\n

Last Year’s Record<\/strong>
\n51-31<\/p>\n

Tom’s Commentary<\/strong>
\nI don’t really know why the Jazz will slip a few games in the standing this year, mostly because I have no idea how they won as many games as they did last year. Carlos Boozer and Deron Williams are fine players, but they’re not exactly the kind of guys you can imagine playing any better than they’re playing already. It’s hard to know how they play at all because to watch them is to fall asleep or turn the channel, even without meaning to. Boozer is so boring that his fine pop-culture pedigree of screwing over a blind man in Cleveland and having his house painted purple by Prince (who could ride around in Boozer’s shirt pocket) somehow become much more boring simply by his involvement.<\/p>\n

Luckily, there’s Andrei Kirilenko, the emaciated Ivan Drago, who’s a few odd rotations and a bad foul call from pulling an Oliver McCall and having a nervous breakdown right on the court during a game with the New Orleans Hornets or something. Also, the Jazz lost some guard depth when the NBA mandated that Derek Fisher be shipped to Los Angeles to better exploit his sick child story.<\/p>\n

Rejoinder From Gil<\/strong>
\nI don’t think I saw a single Jazz game last season, including the playoffs, but I always cheer for them now that Karl Malone is gone.
\nGratuitous Comics Connection<\/strong>
\nOne of the legitimately rare comics of the 1990s was a giveaway comic book for the movie SLC Punk!<\/a><\/p>\n

Gratuitous Pharma Connection<\/strong>
\nThe AAPS had its annual meeting in Salt Lake City in 2003. They’ve chosen some interesting locations. I’m glad that Nashville doesn’t have an NBA team.<\/p>\n

The Bottom Line<\/strong>
\nBoozer stays healthy, AK-47 tries to figure out a way to get his contract voided so he can play in Russia for gigantic money, the Jazz coast to the NW Div title, push the Spurs for homecourt advantage in 2-3 playoff matchup, and then lose to them again in 5 games. –GR<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Predicted Record 48-33 (Tom), 56-36 (Gil) Last Year’s Record 51-31 Tom’s Commentary I don’t really know why the Jazz will slip a few games in the standing this year, mostly because I have no idea how they won as many games as they did last year. Carlos Boozer and Deron Williams are fine players, but … <\/p>\n

Continue reading “Utah Jazz”<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"parent":1713,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","template":"nba0708index.php","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"footnotes":""},"class_list":["post-1730","page","type-page","status-publish","hentry"],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/P4C7K-rU","jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":2781,"url":"http:\/\/chimeraobscura.com\/vm\/nba-2008-09-preview","url_meta":{"origin":1730,"position":0},"title":"NBA 2008-09 Preview","author":"Gil","date":"October 28, 2008","format":false,"excerpt":"The new NBA season is upon us! Sadly, the previous season was so underwhelming that your official VM NBA correspondents have decided to go with one-liners for our previews! (Plus, we jettisoned all the other part-timers, so this year's team-by-team preview comes to you courtesy of Tom Spurgeon and me,\u2026","rel":"","context":"With 3 comments","block_context":{"text":"With 3 comments","link":"http:\/\/chimeraobscura.com\/vm\/nba-2008-09-preview#comments"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"http:\/\/www.assoc-amazon.com\/e\/ir?t=virtualmemories-20&l=as2&o=1&a=141654061X","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":1751,"url":"http:\/\/chimeraobscura.com\/vm\/nba-2007-08-preview\/san-antonio-spurs","url_meta":{"origin":1730,"position":1},"title":"San Antonio Spurs","author":"Gil","date":"October 30, 2007","format":false,"excerpt":"Predicted Record 57-25 (Tom), 59-23 (Gil) Last Year's Record 58-24 Tom's Commentary The Spurs are even boring in the pre-season, so it's hard to want to talk to about them. They're kind of to the NBA what the original-run Joe Gibbs Redskins were to the NFL in the '80s --\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1463,"url":"http:\/\/chimeraobscura.com\/vm\/nba-preview-2006-2007\/nba-2006-2007-playoff-previews","url_meta":{"origin":1730,"position":2},"title":"2006-2007 Playoffs","author":"Gil","date":"April 20, 2007","format":false,"excerpt":"Introduction I'm told that the Phoenix Suns are the odds maker's second pick behind the Mavericks to win the NBA Championship. The Spurs are third. Obviously the Western Conference merely has to show up and they'll be handed the trophy by either Detroit or Miami. But I don't care who\u2026","rel":"","context":"With 2 comments","block_context":{"text":"With 2 comments","link":"http:\/\/chimeraobscura.com\/vm\/nba-preview-2006-2007\/nba-2006-2007-playoff-previews#comments"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1181,"url":"http:\/\/chimeraobscura.com\/vm\/nba-preview-2006-2007","url_meta":{"origin":1730,"position":3},"title":"NBA Preview 2006-2007","author":"Gil","date":"November 2, 2006","format":false,"excerpt":"I'm the Juggernaut, bitch! ATLANTIC Boston Celtics by Tom Spurgeon New Jersey Nets by Gil Roth New York Knicks by Gil Roth Philadelphia 76ers by Adam Taxin Toronto Raptors by Sam Richezza CENTRAL Chicago Bulls by Tom Spurgeon Cleveland Cavaliers by Tom Spurgeon Detroit Pistons by Tom Spurgeon Indiana Pacers\u2026","rel":"","context":"With 4 comments","block_context":{"text":"With 4 comments","link":"http:\/\/chimeraobscura.com\/vm\/nba-preview-2006-2007#comments"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1750,"url":"http:\/\/chimeraobscura.com\/vm\/nba-2007-08-preview\/new-orleans-hornets","url_meta":{"origin":1730,"position":4},"title":"New Orleans Hornets","author":"Gil","date":"October 30, 2007","format":false,"excerpt":"Predicted Record 41-41 (Tom), 45-37 (Gil) Last Year's Record 39-43 Tom's Commentary I like the mix of talent here, which I think should play better than a combination of the individually skilled players, although the fact that it would probably be a legitimately kick-ass team if every one of the\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1720,"url":"http:\/\/chimeraobscura.com\/vm\/nba-2007-08-preview\/atlanta-hawks","url_meta":{"origin":1730,"position":5},"title":"Atlanta Hawks","author":"Gil","date":"October 28, 2007","format":false,"excerpt":"Predicted Record 38-44 (Tom), 28-54 (Gil) Last Year's Record 30-52 Gil's Commentary Are they still in the league? Years of terrible drafts, poor coaching, and ownership lawsuits have translated into a team no one takes seriously, even in the \"poised for a breakout season\" articles. In some respects, they remind\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/chimeraobscura.com\/vm\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/1730","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/chimeraobscura.com\/vm\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/chimeraobscura.com\/vm\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/page"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/chimeraobscura.com\/vm\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/chimeraobscura.com\/vm\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1730"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/chimeraobscura.com\/vm\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/1730\/revisions"}],"up":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/chimeraobscura.com\/vm\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/1713"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/chimeraobscura.com\/vm\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1730"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}