{"id":4404,"date":"2009-08-25T19:00:11","date_gmt":"2009-08-25T23:00:11","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/chimeraobscura.com\/vm\/?p=4404"},"modified":"2009-08-25T19:00:11","modified_gmt":"2009-08-25T23:00:11","slug":"musical-oldth","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/chimeraobscura.com\/vm\/musical-oldth","title":{"rendered":"Musical Oldth"},"content":{"rendered":"

When I was in college (of course), my pal Mark & I talked about launching some sorta alt-culture ‘zine. Our only condition was that it would have nothing to do with music, because we could hold our own in just about any other field, but alt-music is the one field where you’ll always get demolished by someone who’s more “indie” than you. It was the early ’90’s, and people cared about that stuff then; get over it.<\/p>\n

Nowadays, I need the occasional reminder that I’m old (38), out of touch, and otherwise unhip. Contemporary music is a great way to demolish any of my illusions that I can keep up with the kids. In that vein, I was happy that Pitchfork published its list of the top 500 tracks of the decade<\/a>.<\/p>\n

Since Matlock<\/em> was just about to start, I skipped to the top 20, where I discovered that . . . I’m old, out of touch and otherwise unhip!<\/p>\n

So, for your entertainment & edification, let’s count down Pitchfork’s top 20 tracks of the decade in terms of whether or not I ever heard them!<\/p>\n

SONGS I HAVE NEVER EVER HEARD<\/strong><\/p>\n

20. The Walkmen – “The Rat”<\/p>\n

19. R. Kelly – “Ignition (Remix)”<\/p>\n

18. Hercules and Love Affair – “Blind”<\/p>\n

17. Annie – “Heartbeat”<\/p>\n

16. The Rapture – “House of Jealous Lovers”<\/p>\n

15. The Knife – “Heartbeats”<\/p>\n

13. LCD Soundsystem – “Losing My Edge”<\/p>\n

9. Animal Collective – “My Girls”<\/p>\n

8. Radiohead – “Idioteque”<\/p>\n

6. Yeah Yeah Yeahs – “Maps”<\/p>\n

5. Daft Punk – “One More Time”<\/p>\n

2. LCD Soundsystem – “All My Friends”<\/p>\n

SONGS I HAVE HEARD (WITH MY HEARING AID)
\n<\/strong><\/p>\n

14. Jay-Z – “99 Problems”<\/p>\n

12. OutKast – “Hey Ya!”<\/p>\n

11. Gnarls Barkley – “Crazy”<\/p>\n

10. Arcade Fire – “Neighborhood #1 (Tunnels)”<\/p>\n

7. Missy Elliott – “Get Ur Freak On”<\/p>\n

4. Beyonc\u00c3\u00a9 [ft. Jay-Z] – “Crazy in Love”<\/p>\n

3. M.I.A. [ft. Bun B and Rich Boy] – “Paper Planes (Diplo Remix)”<\/p>\n

1. OutKast – “B.O.B.”<\/p>\n

Weirdly enough, almost all the music that I do know from that list is by black artists, while almost every 0-fer was from white artists. This leads me to conclude that<\/p>\n

    \n
  1. I’m racist,<\/li>\n
  2. “YEAH!” by Usher, Lil’ Jon and Ludacris should’ve been somewhere in the top 100, and<\/li>\n
  3. whitey made some shitty music this decade.<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

    For what it’s worth, I’ve never even heard of<\/em> the following bands from the list:<\/p>\n

      \n
    1. The Walkmen<\/li>\n
    2. Hercules and Love Affair<\/li>\n
    3. Annie<\/li>\n
    4. The Rapture<\/li>\n
    5. The Knife<\/li>\n
    6. Animal Collective<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

      The only reason I know LCD Soundsystem is because Slate suckered me into buying their music<\/a>. I hated their record so much I went back to check if the article was originally published on April Fools Day. If these other artists are anything like that, then I understand why the recording industry is collapsing.<\/p>\n

      I only know Arcade Fire because Robert Wilonsky mentioned that their song is used in the first trailer for Where The Wild Things Are<\/a>. It turned out that I had one of their albums (Funeral<\/a>\"\") in my iTunes library, and I think it’s pretty good.<\/p>\n

      Oh, and I think “Hey Ya!” and “Crazy” should have been #1 and #2.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

      When I was in college (of course), my pal Mark & I talked about launching some sorta alt-culture ‘zine. Our only condition was that it would have nothing to do with music, because we could hold our own in just about any other field, but alt-music is the one field where you’ll always get demolished … <\/p>\n

      Continue reading “Musical Oldth”<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[40],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-4404","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-music"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p4C7K-192","jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":14217,"url":"http:\/\/chimeraobscura.com\/vm\/episode-418-sven-birkerts","url_meta":{"origin":4404,"position":0},"title":"Episode 418 – Sven Birkerts","author":"Gil","date":"January 26, 2021","format":"audio","excerpt":"Virtual Memories Show 418: Sven Birkerts \"Rather than try to think of a book to write about, why don't I try to think about where I am in the world, in my life, and my preoccupations, and see if an author announces him- or herself?\" Is it unhip to search\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Art"","block_context":{"text":"Art","link":"http:\/\/chimeraobscura.com\/vm\/category\/art"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chimeraobscura.com\/vm\/wp-content\/uploads\/birkerts2021compB.jpg?fit=1200%2C511&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chimeraobscura.com\/vm\/wp-content\/uploads\/birkerts2021compB.jpg?fit=1200%2C511&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chimeraobscura.com\/vm\/wp-content\/uploads\/birkerts2021compB.jpg?fit=1200%2C511&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chimeraobscura.com\/vm\/wp-content\/uploads\/birkerts2021compB.jpg?fit=1200%2C511&resize=700%2C400 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chimeraobscura.com\/vm\/wp-content\/uploads\/birkerts2021compB.jpg?fit=1200%2C511&resize=1050%2C600 3x"},"classes":[]},{"id":578,"url":"http:\/\/chimeraobscura.com\/vm\/friends","url_meta":{"origin":4404,"position":1},"title":"Friends","author":"Gil","date":"June 1, 2005","format":false,"excerpt":"An ongoing thing in this blog is the importance of friendship. 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