{"id":4404,"date":"2009-08-25T19:00:11","date_gmt":"2009-08-25T23:00:11","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/chimeraobscura.com\/vm\/?p=4404"},"modified":"2009-08-25T19:00:11","modified_gmt":"2009-08-25T23:00:11","slug":"musical-oldth","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/chimeraobscura.com\/vm\/musical-oldth","title":{"rendered":"Musical Oldth"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>When I was in college (of course), my pal Mark &amp; I talked about launching some sorta alt-culture &#8216;zine. Our only condition was that it would have nothing to do with music, because we could hold our own in just about any other field, but alt-music is the one field where you&#8217;ll always get demolished by someone who&#8217;s more &#8220;indie&#8221; than you. It was the early &#8217;90&#8217;s, and people cared about that stuff then; get over it.<\/p>\n<p>Nowadays, I need the occasional reminder that I&#8217;m old (38), out of touch, and otherwise unhip. Contemporary music is a great way to demolish any of my illusions that I can keep up with the kids. In that vein, I was happy that <a href=\"http:\/\/pitchfork.com\/features\/staff-lists\/7693-the-top-500-tracks-of-the-2000s-20-1\/\" target=\"_blank\">Pitchfork published its list of the top 500 tracks of the decade<\/a>.<\/p>\n<p>Since <em>Matlock<\/em> was just about to start, I skipped to the top 20, where I discovered that . . . I&#8217;m old, out of touch and otherwise unhip!<\/p>\n<p>So, for your entertainment &amp; edification, let&#8217;s count down Pitchfork&#8217;s top 20 tracks of the decade in terms of whether or not I ever heard them!<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><strong>SONGS I HAVE NEVER EVER HEARD<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>20. The Walkmen &#8211; &#8220;The Rat&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>19. R. Kelly &#8211; &#8220;Ignition (Remix)&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>18. Hercules and Love Affair &#8211; &#8220;Blind&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>17. Annie &#8211; &#8220;Heartbeat&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>16. The Rapture &#8211; &#8220;House of Jealous Lovers&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>15. The Knife &#8211; &#8220;Heartbeats&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>13. LCD Soundsystem &#8211; &#8220;Losing My Edge&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>9. Animal Collective &#8211; &#8220;My Girls&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>8. Radiohead &#8211; &#8220;Idioteque&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>6. Yeah Yeah Yeahs &#8211; &#8220;Maps&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>5. Daft Punk &#8211; &#8220;One More Time&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>2. LCD Soundsystem &#8211; &#8220;All My Friends&#8221;<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><strong>SONGS I HAVE HEARD (WITH MY HEARING AID)<br \/>\n<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>14. Jay-Z &#8211; &#8220;99 Problems&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>12. OutKast &#8211; &#8220;Hey Ya!&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>11. Gnarls Barkley &#8211; &#8220;Crazy&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>10. Arcade Fire &#8211; &#8220;Neighborhood #1 (Tunnels)&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>7. Missy Elliott &#8211; &#8220;Get Ur Freak On&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>4. Beyonc\u00c3\u00a9 [ft. Jay-Z] &#8211; &#8220;Crazy in Love&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>3. M.I.A. [ft. Bun B and Rich Boy] &#8211; &#8220;Paper Planes (Diplo Remix)&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>1. OutKast &#8211; &#8220;B.O.B.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>Weirdly enough, almost all the music that I do know from that list is by black artists, while almost every 0-fer was from white artists. This leads me to conclude that<\/p>\n<ol>\n<li>I&#8217;m racist,<\/li>\n<li>&#8220;YEAH!&#8221; by Usher, Lil&#8217; Jon and Ludacris should&#8217;ve been somewhere in the top 100, and<\/li>\n<li>whitey made some shitty music this decade.<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n<p>For what it&#8217;s worth, I&#8217;ve never even <em>heard of<\/em> the following bands from the list:<\/p>\n<ol>\n<li>The Walkmen<\/li>\n<li>Hercules and Love Affair<\/li>\n<li>Annie<\/li>\n<li>The Rapture<\/li>\n<li>The Knife<\/li>\n<li>Animal Collective<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n<p>The only reason I know LCD Soundsystem is because Slate <a href=\"http:\/\/slate.com\/id\/2174176\/\" target=\"_blank\">suckered me into buying their music<\/a>. I hated their record so much I went back to check if the article was originally published on April Fools Day. If these other artists are anything like that, then I understand why the recording industry is collapsing.<\/p>\n<p>I only know Arcade Fire because Robert Wilonsky mentioned that their song is used in the <a href=\"http:\/\/www.apple.com\/trailers\/wb\/wherethewildthingsare\/\" target=\"_blank\">first trailer for Where The Wild Things Are<\/a>. It turned out that I had one of their albums (<a href=\"http:\/\/www.amazon.com\/gp\/product\/B000U7XUKK?ie=UTF8&amp;tag=virtualmemories-20&amp;linkCode=as2&amp;camp=1789&amp;creative=9325&amp;creativeASIN=B000U7XUKK\">Funeral<\/a><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" style=\"border:none !important; margin:0px !important;\" src=\"http:\/\/www.assoc-amazon.com\/e\/ir?t=virtualmemories-20&amp;l=as2&amp;o=1&amp;a=B000U7XUKK\" border=\"0\" alt=\"\" width=\"1\" height=\"1\" \/>) in my iTunes library, and I think it&#8217;s pretty good.<\/p>\n<p>Oh, and I think &#8220;Hey Ya!&#8221; and &#8220;Crazy&#8221; should have been #1 and #2.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>When I was in college (of course), my pal Mark &amp; I talked about launching some sorta alt-culture &#8216;zine. Our only condition was that it would have nothing to do with music, because we could hold our own in just about any other field, but alt-music is the one field where you&#8217;ll always get demolished &hellip; <\/p>\n<p class=\"link-more\"><a href=\"https:\/\/chimeraobscura.com\/vm\/musical-oldth\" class=\"more-link\">Continue reading<span class=\"screen-reader-text\"> &#8220;Musical Oldth&#8221;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[40],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-4404","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-music"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p4C7K-192","jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":14217,"url":"https:\/\/chimeraobscura.com\/vm\/episode-418-sven-birkerts","url_meta":{"origin":4404,"position":0},"title":"Episode 418 &#8211; Sven Birkerts","author":"Gil","date":"January 26, 2021","format":"audio","excerpt":"Virtual Memories Show 418: Sven Birkerts \"Rather than try to think of a book to write about, why don't I try to think about where I am in the world, in my life, and my preoccupations, and see if an author announces him- or herself?\" Is it unhip to search\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Art&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Art","link":"https:\/\/chimeraobscura.com\/vm\/category\/art"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chimeraobscura.com\/vm\/wp-content\/uploads\/birkerts2021compB.jpg?fit=1200%2C511&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chimeraobscura.com\/vm\/wp-content\/uploads\/birkerts2021compB.jpg?fit=1200%2C511&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chimeraobscura.com\/vm\/wp-content\/uploads\/birkerts2021compB.jpg?fit=1200%2C511&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chimeraobscura.com\/vm\/wp-content\/uploads\/birkerts2021compB.jpg?fit=1200%2C511&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chimeraobscura.com\/vm\/wp-content\/uploads\/birkerts2021compB.jpg?fit=1200%2C511&ssl=1&resize=1050%2C600 3x"},"classes":[]},{"id":578,"url":"https:\/\/chimeraobscura.com\/vm\/friends","url_meta":{"origin":4404,"position":1},"title":"Friends","author":"Gil","date":"June 1, 2005","format":false,"excerpt":"An ongoing thing in this blog is the importance of friendship. I care a lot about my friends, even though I've seen a couple of decades-long friendships melt down in the past year or two.Tonight, while I was yo-yo'ing on Rt. 287 (I felt like a vroom, okay?), I thought\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1089,"url":"https:\/\/chimeraobscura.com\/vm\/outta-touch","url_meta":{"origin":4404,"position":2},"title":"Outta touch","author":"Gil","date":"August 24, 2006","format":false,"excerpt":"Sorry it's been a quiet week, dear readers. I've been busy at work, but I've also found myself falling into one of my wheels-within-wheels paranoiac phases. It's centered on trying to get at an understanding of the power-relations at play in the current Gulf War. Anyway, I gotta write an\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Pharmaceuticals&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Pharmaceuticals","link":"https:\/\/chimeraobscura.com\/vm\/category\/big-business\/pharmaceuticals"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1185,"url":"https:\/\/chimeraobscura.com\/vm\/throw-the-jew-etc-etc","url_meta":{"origin":4404,"position":3},"title":"Throw the Jew, etc., etc.","author":"Gil","date":"November 3, 2006","format":false,"excerpt":"Ron Rosenbaum prefers the HBO-Borat to the movie version: [T]o me the original Borat segments were more than stupid-funny; they were extremely smart-funny, occasionally even off-handedly profound, as the fake Kazakh newsman \"personality\" managed to tease out moments of appalling honesty from ordinary Americans with a light touch and brilliant\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Religion&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Religion","link":"https:\/\/chimeraobscura.com\/vm\/category\/religion"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":4576,"url":"https:\/\/chimeraobscura.com\/vm\/publishers-at-play","url_meta":{"origin":4404,"position":4},"title":"Publishers at Play","author":"Gil","date":"October 25, 2009","format":false,"excerpt":"When I was a pretentious young man (I'm older now; but that doesn't mean I'm less pretentious), the Paris Review Writers at Work anthologies were my Bible. (Or at least my Apocrypha. My Bible was a mash-up of Tropic of Cancer and Inside the Whale.) I'd seek out the collections\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;0-fer&quot;","block_context":{"text":"0-fer","link":"https:\/\/chimeraobscura.com\/vm\/category\/literature\/0-fer"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"http:\/\/www.assoc-amazon.com\/e\/ir?t=virtualmemories-20&l=as2&o=1&a=0802131786","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":1494,"url":"https:\/\/chimeraobscura.com\/vm\/bio-logic","url_meta":{"origin":4404,"position":5},"title":"Bio Logic","author":"Gil","date":"May 6, 2007","format":false,"excerpt":"I'm off to the BIO conference in Boston, dear readers! Blogging may be pretty light, as I likely won't have much free time, between exhibit hall hours and dinner. Still, I'll try to take neat pix, make funny observations, and otherwise entertain you when I'm back.","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Big Business&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Big Business","link":"https:\/\/chimeraobscura.com\/vm\/category\/big-business"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/chimeraobscura.com\/vm\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4404","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/chimeraobscura.com\/vm\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/chimeraobscura.com\/vm\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chimeraobscura.com\/vm\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chimeraobscura.com\/vm\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=4404"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/chimeraobscura.com\/vm\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4404\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":4637,"href":"https:\/\/chimeraobscura.com\/vm\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4404\/revisions\/4637"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/chimeraobscura.com\/vm\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=4404"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chimeraobscura.com\/vm\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=4404"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chimeraobscura.com\/vm\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=4404"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}