Sorry there’s no new posts, dear reader. I’ve been pretty busy with the year-end giganto-issue of the magazine, and haven’t had time for much of anything else.<\/p>\n
Except for our office Christmas party. This year, I joined the writing squad for our annual “Carnac”-inspired joke-fest, where our boss comes out in a turban and cape and does the “answer first, then question” routine. I only mention this because my favorite joke failed to get a single laugh, but managed to make the entire room of 80 people gasp.<\/p>\n
Here’s the setup: one of our ad salesgirls quit earlier this year and moved to Florida. She was pretty incompetent, and never sold much. So, since our jokes revolve around current-ish events and departed employees, I came up with the following:<\/p>\n
Answer: “Terry Schiavo”<\/p>\n
Question: “Who did [ad salesgirl] replace as the laziest person in Florida?”<\/p>\n
One of my fellow joke-writers almost choked when I came up with that one. Trying to be ‘sensitive,’ the committee changed it to, “Who is the only person in Florida with less brain activity than [ad salesgirl]?”<\/p>\n
As I said, not a single laugh. I chalk it up to game theory; if one person started laughing, I bet others would’ve loosened up. But I wasn’t gonna be the one to start it.<\/p>\n
Anyway, the party went well, even if our favorite office drunk failed to get blown up this year and break a table, like he did two years ago.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Sorry there’s no new posts, dear reader. I’ve been pretty busy with the year-end giganto-issue of the magazine, and haven’t had time for much of anything else. Except for our office Christmas party. This year, I joined the writing squad for our annual “Carnac”-inspired joke-fest, where our boss comes out in a turban and cape … <\/p>\n