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F*** You, You Whining F***: 8/5/08

Why are newspapers falling to pieces? There’s a perfect storm of reasons, including the destruction of the diurnal newscycle, the obliteration of their local classified ad market by Craiglist and its ilk, and increases in paper and distribution costs.

Then there’s the fact that they publish crappy, irrelevant opinion articles. Case in point: today’s Whining F***, Richard Cohen of the Washington Post. A few weeks ago, Cohen wrote an Andy Rooneyesque rant about kids today and their crazy tattoos. Today? He complains that Amazon is destroying The Book by trying to “digitize everything in sight” and make us all buy Kindles.

See, Amazon is “inadvertently thinking of ways to make the world worse for children and for the grown-ups who love them to pieces” by, um, offering people options for how they buy and read books (and not trying to end world hunger and/or take Rush Limbaugh off the air: seriously). I support independent bookstores over chain stores; I love the serendipity factor of walking among the shelves of a well-stocked used bookstore.

That said, I really love Amazon’s ability to find virtually any book that I’m looking for, and I love the Kindle’s ability to get me a book within moments of my ordering it, like it did last evening after I read a sample of Jimmy Breslin’s new book, The Good Rat.

Here’s my favorite — by which I mean, “most befuddling” — passage from Mr. Cohen’s cranky rant regular column, which was published in one of the largest newspapers in the country:

I used to frequent one in New York — Books and Co., now closed — that recommended certain kinds of books. It led me to Joseph Roth, the great central European writer of the interwar period, and Thomas Bernhard, the eccentric Austrian who so hated his country he wouldn’t permit his plays to be staged there. I read all of Bernhard and all of Roth. What joy — although Bernhard, to tell the truth, was sometimes a bit of a slog.

Can Amazon do anything like that? Does Kessel — “We wake up every day thinking about digital,” he once told the New York Times — even know who Roth was? Roth killed himself in Paris. At least he never knew that one day he might be digitized.

So, while we weren’t looking, Amazon must have updated its store and removed all “you might be interested in” suggestions as well as the reader reviews that offer up just these sorts of associations. Or Richard Cohen is a Whining F***.

Any suggestions for his next column topic?

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What ELSE I’m Happy About

I forgot to mention the other thing that made me happy this past week: Official VM best pal Ian Kelley just graduated officer candidate school and is now Ensign Kelley! Congrats!

(I wanted to attend the graduation ceremony up in Rhode Island, but that Springsteen show with my brother took priority . . .)

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What It Is: 8/4/08

What I’m reading: Finished A Reader’s Manifesto, by B.R. Myers, and The Beast in the Jungle, by Henry James. Started Strange and Stranger: The World of Steve Ditko, by Blake Bell.

What I’m listening to: Just shuffling on my iPod, while I figure out how to reinstall my Sirius radio in my car in a way that will prevent my dog from chewing through the antenna cable again.

What I’m watching: Spaced, some Angels-Yankees, and . . . the fourth season of The Wire! At last!

What I’m drinking: Plymouth G&T.

Where I’m going: Nowhere, although I’m considering going up to Saratoga in two weeks to see Gillian Welch play the folk festival.

What I’m happy about: Getting to see my brother last week, and getting out to that Bruce show.

What I’m sad about: The weird noise coming out of the water heater downstairs. Especially after that episode of Mythbusters.

What I’m pondering: Lots of big, intricate sentences by Henry James.

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License to Ill

Both the Giants and the Jets are planning to sell “Personal Seat Licenses” (PSLs) to gouge season ticket holders pay for construction of their new shared stadium. This morning’s Newark Star-Ledger has an article on the subject, and it makes one of the most bone-headed statements I’ve read about PSLs.

The cost of building stadiums — along with cities’ increasing reluctance to commit tax dollars to sports projects — has made such fees necessary at new venues, according to sports finance experts. The $1.6 billion stadium being built next to the current Giants Stadium is expected to open in mid-2010. These fees would help fund the construction.

The Giants and Jets are sharing the costs of what is expected to be the most expensive stadium built. The state is paying an estimated $300 million for infrastructure improvements at the Meadowlands, as well as other costs related to the new venue.

The Giants’ seat licenses are expected to bring in $300 million to $400 million, team co-owner John Mara said in June. If the Jets were to match that with their take from the PSLs, the cost of the stadium construction would have been cut in half.

That’s right! The cost of the stadium will be cut in half by PSLs! A $1.6 billion stadium — the most expensive ever, the article notes — will only cost half as much! PSLs are magic!

Actually, the cost of building the $1.6 billion stadium is $1.6 billion, you morons. It’s just a question of whose $1.6 billion is going to pay for it. And thanks to PSLs, it looks like loyal season ticket buyers are going to be on the hook for half of it!

At least the Star-Ledger’s economic idiocy isn’t as bad as the NY Daily News’ attempt at making PSLs look like they’re a favor to the fans:

The Jets and Giants are discussing a plan that would give the owners of personal seat licenses (PSLs) first dibs on concert tickets and other non-football events in the new $1.6 billion stadium, Jets owner Woody Johnson revealed Saturday.

Johnson, confirming the Jets will announce their PSL pricing plan later this month, said it may include a system for Jets and Giants PSL owners to “alternate events as they come along during the year — concerts, a tractor pull, whatever we have.”

That certainly would make PSLs more appealing for those apprehensive about shelling out thousands of dollars.

Really? If a ticket-holder comes up with thousands of dollars to help finance your football stadium, you’ll also give him first crack at tickets for a tractor pull? Awesome! Where do I sign up?

I guess it’s too much to expect the local sports sections, which rely on access to these teams, to offer anything but the party line.

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This pier lights our carnival life forever

As mentioned in my previous post, we spent last Tuesday at Sea Bright, NJ and environs. Part of “environs” was Asbury Park. We went here when I was a little kid, but I don’t remember a darn thing from those trips. I mean, if I remembered anything, it would’ve been the wonderful buildings here, right?

To make sure I don’t forget this stuff in another 30+ years, I busted out my camera and took a bunch of pix. Just click through the image to see the show!

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Way Down in the Hole

I spent Tuesday with my brother and his best pal down at Sea Bright, NJ, and environs. Here are a couple of pix from the beach (more to come from the aforementioned environs), and some video of my brother’s exploits. He swears that this activity wasn’t symbolic of anything:

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Set List

Bruce put on a heck of a show last night, even though the awful NJ traffic left us with a 9:30pm start, rather than the unofficial 8:30 start (the tickets are for a 7:30pm start; hah!). My two observations about the band:

  1. Nils Lofgren may be shorter than Seth Green (but he had an awesome solo in Because the Night)
  2. Max Weinberg bears an unfortunate resemblance to Harold Ramis (but he drove the entire show)

Here’s the set list from the concert:

Summertime Blues

10th Ave Freeze-Out

Radio Nowhere

Prove It All Night

Two Hearts are Better than One

Promised Land

Spirit in the Night

Light of Day

Brilliant Disguise

Pretty Flamingo

Blinded by the Light

Cadillac Ranch

Candy’s Room

Night

Because the Night

She’s the One

Living in the Future

Mary’s Place

Incident on 57th St.

The Rising

Last to Die

Long Walk Home

Badlands

First Encore

Jungleland

Born to Run

Bobby Jean

Dancing in the Dark

American Land

Second Encore

Jersey Girl

Rosalita

I had a blast, especially since he kept the preaching to a minimum (unlike the time I saw him in 2003, which I don’t seem to have written about), but that late start meant that I walked in the door at home at 2:10am. Now I’m up at 5:30, taking care of the dog and I’ll bring my wife down to the bus stop in an hour. It’s humbling, given that I just watched a 59-year-old man perform for 3 hours and 15 minutes without a break.

Good thing I’m not heading into the office today!

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Off to the Promised Land

Sorry about the lack of posts today, dear readers! I was getting tons of work done so I could get out of the office early, meet up with my brother, and head over to Giants Stadium for the Springsteen show! More later!