Sunny and lazy
with a 100% chance of adorable
The Saddest Thing
The weather was so gorgeous today, I took a half-day from work. I thought about hiking some trails, but I can do that over weekend. Instead, I rolled up to Woodbury Common Outlet Mall to look for a higher-end tux discounted to cheap Jew levels. (My lack of formalwear nearly bit me on the ass this week, so I decided to finally buy one.) I ended up also buying a few shirts, a tie, and a new pair of Merrell Chameleons, to replace the ones that I had on and that needed to be burned.
I stopped at the food court around 2 to get a snack, and that’s where I saw the saddest thing:
I thought about picking it up, but realized it was exactly where it needed to be.
Invisible, not Inaudible
The second episode of Virtual Memories radio is live! I mean, taped and edited and stuff, but it’s posted! You can download the MP3 right here! Or download the AAC/M4A file! (I figured out how to embed chapter marks in the AAC version!)
Be easy on me. I’m still feeling my way through this form, and I really hate that it’s just a monologue right now. Once I get some interviews recorded, I think it’ll really take off. But meanwhile, enjoy the ramble!
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Who Am I?
I’m the guy who seems to hold white people to higher standards of service than non-white people. At least when it comes to coffee.
If I get shitty service from a Starbucks (generally staffed by white people), I avoid returning to it for a long time. If I get shitty service at a Dunkin Donuts (generally staffed by Indians, Pakistanis, or Latinos), I cut them some slack and figure they’ll be better next time.
Wintertime Blues
It’s been a while since I’ve posted anything of note. Here’s a list of reasons for that, but I’m not sure which ones have the most weight:
- I suffer from anxiety
- I suffer from mild depression and/or this winter has depressed the crap out of me
- I have a lot of work to do at my day job and feel guilty if I “waste” writing-time on myself
- I don’t feel like writing or sharing things that I once did, because Facebook has become the default destination for minor personal observations
- I feel like I can outsource being clever to Twitter
- I use my tumblr blog to post short book-excerpts and literature-related thoughts
- I let myself get distracted and drown in tweets and RSS feeds
- I spend too much time by myself and the lack of conversation really takes a toll on me
- I feel tapped out and don’t have much to say (I think this is a big one, but it’s just a symptom and not a cause; I’ve started a couple of posts that just seemed useless, so I zapped ’em)
- I make it too easy not to write
- I would rather write a book of anecdotes and observations about my old man
- I would rather launch a regular podcast, if I can just suss out some technical issues and get over my anxiety about asking someone to sit down for an interview
- I would rather work with Amy to make video-montages set to music
- I have a sneaking suspicion you’re all tired of my stories, observations and complaints
- I have a sneaking suspicion that I’m a fraud
- I don’t get around much anymore
I know that if I just get back to writing, it’ll alleviate a lot of the symptoms, but I just can’t do it. I’m afraid I sound like a DTC ad for an antipsychotic med.
Maybe I should go back to posting those What It Is updates every week, but I came to resent the imposition of those, too, just like all the other regular features I tried to write.
I often find myself singing John Entwistle’s song, 905: “All I know is what I need to know / Everything I do’s been done before / Every sentence in my head / Someone else has said / At each end of my life is an open door.”
It’s never a good sign for an adult to find life-parallels in any song by The Who. I’m gonna try and cheer myself up with some Sam Cooke.
Life doesn’t get any better than this
Happy birthday, my love!
Unrequired Reading: The Februariad
Here’s your monthly dose of Unrequired Reading, dear readers who are too lazy or otherwise uninclined to follow my twitter feed at twitter.com/groth18
My dogs would get so confused on these awesome staircases.
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Nothing about how Craigslist enables Arab protestors and revolutionaries to get laid? #noitdoesnt
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Great pix from Sept. shuttle trip in honor of my production manager, who bailed on our current ish to watch the launch.
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Simon Schama on Helen Mirren. Well, not ON Helen Mirren, but you know. #IneverdidseethatMazurskyversionoftheTempest
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Sadly, I’m sure there’s a novel/screenplay about a romance between a mope and a fluffer.
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So it’s better to shoot at civilian protestors with 7.62s, not .50s?
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“Exotic Superfluid Found in Ultra-Dense Stellar Corpse”: the title of the new Orb record? #littlefluffytweets
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Glad to find out street heroin and my G&Ts both have quinine: always important to stave off malaria. #themoreyouknow
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I’d be afraid of the NJ version of this #50moststylishnewyorkers list.
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Gator and the Berra. #NYY #louisianalightning
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Don’t bet against the Tic-Tac-Toe Chicken. #starbucksduanereadeorcupcakes
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Profile of Al Goldstein: the (not-)new pornographer.
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Greatest. Memo. Ever. #weneedtosolvepakistanbeforelunch
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@simondoonan: not exactly a fan of Fashion Week (but hilarious). http://slate.me/gLK6Jz #nyfw
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There really should be a Yinka Dare award, too. #nbaantiawards
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Great Michael Caine interview. Get Carter was #badass
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“Alcoholic hospice”? I used to joke about drinking with careerist determination, but wow.
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Ahoy-ahoy! #thatisall
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If only Bill Murray had missed out on The Man Who Knew Too Little, too… http://bit.ly/fCEPi9 #billmurray #castingdirectorofbabel
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To Mr. & Mrs. Ball, a son: Curve. #intheloop #greatestmovieever
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That’s it! No Ferrari for me! #okayidriveasubaru
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KenJen on #Watson: very smart, very fast, speaks in an uneven monotone, and has never known the touch of a woman.
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Michael Lewis (satirically) on who’s to blame for the financial crisis: #blamecanada?
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It’d be funnier if the greys just took off like rockets: #judginggreyhounds
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Did NYC consult @dandrezner for the zombie invasion section? #apocalypselaw #escapefromnewyork
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West Egg. 8-Bit. Great Gatsby video game. #gatsbyfornes
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Great piece by Adam Kirsch on literary criticism. Go read it! #notbookreviews
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Sartoria Rossi: or is it Satori Rossi? #beitalian #iwishicoulddressthiswell
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@nealstephenson on the development of the Rocket #ficktnichtmitderRaketemensch! #youdroppedthebombonme
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Valentine’s Day special! Here are the best NYC restaurants in which to stage a breakup! #noromance
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Fun story of SEO abuse on Google. #jcpenney #seohack
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Not on the menu @ Veselka: Ron Rosenbaum on cannibalism in the Ukraine c.1932-3 #noendtoevil #ieatcannibals
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Schizo NYC from @jeremoss: Two-Face, Composite Superman, or Ultra The Multi-Alien? #splitcity #uglierbytheday
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“Yoga in bed” is a euphemism, right? #clydefrazier #whatrhymeswithtantric
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Ouroussoff fluffery on new Gehry bldg. Was this actually written by a computer using random samples of O’s prose?
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Important lesson – never marry a chemist: #whenxiaoyemetthallium
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I’d wear Jesse Eisenberg’s costuming from Social Network before I’d be caught dead in Sorkin’s sack suit #badfashion
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Richie Rich: explosion on the runway. http://bit.ly/gyAz2R #nyfw
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My old man swears he once reached a polar research base with his HAM setup: #wb2zvs
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Not quite as implausible as Jews In Space, but it’s close: Jews In Syria! (neat story, trust me) http://bit.ly/gkOntd
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Neat @nicknotned (Nick Denton) Atlantic Wire interview about his news consumption habits.
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Covering J.G. Ballard #jgballard
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Real question is: Can a novel be “philosophical” without being dreadfully dull? #doubtit
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Metropolitan or Gossip Girl? or … #whitstillman #gossipgirl (I’m a Metropolitan man)
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Queenstown, where I heard the voice of God (also, where I bungee-jumped) http://nyti.ms/dSZiHx
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Greatest. Band name. Ever. #drteethandtheelectricmayhem
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Clive James on roman policier: #okaytheyrecrimenovels
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The honey badger doesn’t give a shit: #randall
Honey badger remains b-a-d-a-s-s (I can’t even survive drinking half a 40 of King Cobra). #honeybadger
Babygrip
Look! I can hold a baby without it exploding! From last weekend’s visit to St. Louis to see my newborn niece Orli:
Crazy Eights
My Google Calendar just reminded me that today marks the 8th anniversary of Virtual Memories! For you long-time readers, many thanks for sticking around all these years!
Now congratulate me for perseverance in the face of irrelevance and/or obsolescence! Or buy me something!
(Oh, and check out my new book-oriented Tumblr blog, Montaigne’s Library, somedarntime!)
Unrequired Reading: The Return!
At New Year’s, I decided to call an end to the weekly Unrequired Reading posts, figuring that it was easier for people to just follow my Twitter feed (twitter.com/groth18) and/or Facebook posts. But at that party I attended a few weeks ago, two other old acquaintances told me that they enjoyed this feature and were kinda bummed that I’d decided to stop posting it.
So I’ve decided to compromise: Every month (or thereabouts), I’ll post a mega-Unrequired Reading for those of you too goshdarned lazy to just add me to their Twitter feeds! Enjoy! (yes, I left the hashtags in so you’d have some idea of what the posts are about.)
Continue reading “Unrequired Reading: The Return!”