I can only hope that after 10 years of marriage, Amy & I have gift-giving fights as good as the one Judd Apatow has with Leslie Mann.
Holiday Bounce
On the way out Friday, I set my outgoing voice-mail message to let callers know that I won’t be back in the office till January 2nd. Usually, I end that sorta message with, “If you need immediate assistance, please call my associate editor [whose name I don’t wanna give out] at extension 326,” but she’s going to be out till Jan. 2, too.
That’s when I decided that anybody who calls next week surely can’t be taken seriously.
So, till we get back, my associate editor and I have both set up our voice-mails to instruct the caller to contact the other one “for immediate assistance.”
That’ll learn ’em!
The Internet Never Fails To Amaze Me
At present, Amazon features 964 user reviews of a gallon of whole milk.
Will You Quit Your Goddamn Nagging?
I ordered the first three seasons of The Wire
Year of the my dogs are killing me
According to their packaging, my new dress shoes from Rockport are “Powered by DMX,” which worries me:
Of course, it could be worse. They could be powered by a testicular condition that can lead to death.
Good night, sweet Pimp C
“Free Pimp C” . . . from this mortal coil.
Cold blooded
Insanely heavy winds keeping me up half the night? (If you saw the trees outside our house, you’d worry too.) Check!
Inexplicable standstill extending my morning commute by 25 minutes? Check!
Irritatingly cold office waiting for me?
Check!
Evel Dead
Man’s curse is to know that he must someday make the great leap into the unknown.
Except for Evel Knievel, who made a great many of those leaps before taking his last one today. Good night, sweet daredevil.
This Quiet Riot is… Too Quiet
Kevin DuBrow of Quiet Riot was found dead yesterday at the age of 52. So far, there’s no word on whether this was a cover version of the death of someone from Slade.