Back in 2002, I got a fortune-cookie that read, “A reunion with an old acquaintance will turn out disastrous.” I saved it because it was so pessimistic. Also, I appreciated the fact that it was a fortune, and not an aphorism. A week or so later, I hooked up with an ex-girlfriend I hadn’t seen in almost a decade, and it didn’t turn out so bad.
According to the NYTimes, bad fortunes are making their way through the rotation. My official VM fortune to you: Avoid Chinese food for a while.